Terren Apples - Kiddie AU

[sliceitwithwind]

Braig was out of the room when Dilan peeked back in, finally. He grabbed the bag, which over the course of packing had taken on capital letters; The Bag. It had the G-strings with their fake fig leaves, the apples, Aya's clear bra, and the container that held one comfortably dozing snake.

Dilan had checked, it was fine to keep the snake curled up in there for the couple of hours it had taken...and he'd checked on it every time they stopped. Still a very large snake. Very large. He poked the remaining lump in the bed, "Aya! He's out!"

He dropped her share of stuff on the bed and started stripping with absolutely no regard for modesty. Not that he'd ever had any. The usual array of noises that occurred after every waxing were made, along with giggles. (Manly giggles.)

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[sliceitwithwind]

"Yes. That is." His lips twisted into something sort-of like a smile, "It's easier with Dilan, because we date the same girls. It's not easy, though. I am so fucking jealous all the fucking time. It's like. Damn."

[mitochondriaaya]

Pierce is watching you Braig, just so you know. With that 'I shouldn't be surprised or amused but I kinda am' look. "You hide the constant, seething hatred for competitors well most days. Maybe it hides behind the ego?" A lot could be eclipsed by the ego.

Hell, small countries could be hidden in the shadow of that ego.

[sliceitwithwind]

"I will...never never admit this. Ever again." Braig said, "But some of the ego is for show. To help hide shit. It's fucking painful, dude, but if I want things to be good...it's how it has to be."

[mitochondriaaya]

"Dude, does that mean if things work out that some of the go will go away?" Color him...skeptical. A little. "So, anyway, fill me in on your master plan here so I don't accidentally step on shit."

[sliceitwithwind]

"...Mmmmmaybe." No. The Egosphere reigns supreme. "Um. Don't be a fucking idiot, let them figure out what they want in life, eventually confess?"

It seemed like a good plan to him?

[mitochondriaaya]

"Oooooookay. Time frame?" Because, well, eventually was a long time away and Aya was at a college with, well, guys. "And just so you know? Assault of con dudes totally goes under 'fucking idiot' tonight. Let's work on that! We can have hand signals!"

[sliceitwithwind]

"No fucking clue." Braig said with a snort, "It'll take however long it takes. They, like, totally swung first."

[mitochondriaaya]

"Only cause you're really, really good at provoking people." Maybe it was a pheromones or something? Or just sheer macho overbearing tweaking male egos. "You know this is gonna make stuff awkward a little. I mean...Aya's my friend. and I'm gonna be supportive of her and stuff, but you're my friend and...augh."

[sliceitwithwind]

"Yeah, I know." He really is good at provoking people. It makes things easier in the long run. "Nah, it's easy. Support her and be ready to beat the shit out of me with a bat if I fuck up."

[mitochondriaaya]

...he may have tried to inhale some of his drink there. Pardon him while he gasps Braig. "Will you be hitting back?!"

[sliceitwithwind]

"Not if you tell me I'm fucking up Aya or Dilan." Braig said simply, "I trust you not to abuse it, man."

[mitochondriaaya]

"Okay, note to self, if going at Braig with a bat, preface with war cry about fucking up the others." He touched his fingers to his forehead like he was hitting a record button.

[sliceitwithwind]

It made Braig snort a little, and take a slug from his latest drink (he isn't sure what it is, but the little dude is taking them at their word as far as fucked up and brain killing goes).

[mitochondriaaya]

"Sure, snort, see if I don't some day." Pierce pointed a finger dramatically at Braig then finished off his latest glass too. Couldn't fall behind really (toothpaste drink aside). "I get to be your suspicious, brooding, romance Batman."

[sliceitwithwind]

"...Dude." Braig looked up at the taller man, "You do suspicious okay, but the rest? As if."

[mitochondriaaya]

"No no no! Here me out! I've got gadgets, I get to be uber suspicious of your motives, and a tendency to operate at night despite the sunglasses! And I can brood about maybe fucking your thing up, or fucking their things up, and fucking my things up in my spare time!"

[sliceitwithwind]

"I think you're more trashed than I am. Why are you more trashed than me? I need more alcohol."

[mitochondriaaya]

"No, I just like Batman. You're right though, I don't have the pecs." He was not as trashed as Braig! He was just goofy. "And no one really wants to see me in spandex."

[sliceitwithwind]

"Eh, I know a couple of girls who wouldn't mind." Because part of why Pierce likes Braig is that Braig directs him towards women interested in blond, skinny, half-Olia geeks. "Remind me to give you numbers tomorrow."

[mitochondriaaya]

"You always know a couple of girls man. I swear, it's sick. You're hopelessly hooked on some people and STILL GET SWARMED. Really man, you've got pheromones." Damn pheromones. Heeeyyyyy...

..."Dude, we could bottle you."

[sliceitwithwind]

"I am sexy, badass, and rich." Braig pointed out, "Of course I get girls. You should just be thankful that I share the bounty. You cannot bottle me."

[mitochondriaaya]

"....naaaaaaaaaah. I think it's pheromones. You have lemur 'mones man." Which obviously Pierce missed out on by being halfsy. Woe-is-him. "Just a little bottling? For science?"

[sliceitwithwind]

"No bottling! Science doesn't need my sweat." Geeeesh. "Though it might be genetic. Mom says dad used to fight 'em off with sticks. At least until she started doing so literally."

Never. Mess. With. Elcy.

[mitochondriaaya]

"Dude. Okay, blood sample then. From you and your dad. For all of male kind!" Pierce lifted his glass in a classic 'evil plot toast' and then tossed his latest back. "Wow, if you do manage to land Dilan and Aya do you think they'll get violently jealous? They are violent...violent like you know."

[sliceitwithwind]

"Dilan isn't violent." Braig pointed out with a silly smile, "It'll totally be Aya defending my non-existent virtue. Dilan will just be a Katzu shield from the world."